My Unreal Music

Posted: June 29, 2013 in My Music, Storytime
Tags: , , , , , ,

It’s interesting to be a music creator as well as music consumer. What I’ve noticed over the years is that I rarely think a song I’ve written sounds like “real” music. I mean, it’s music, yes, and it’s OK, but from my perspective, it lacks that special something, that oomph, that magic, that beauty, that mystery, that element that makes me crave it, that makes me want to hear it over and over and over again – the very things we all find in our favorite songs.

Sometimes other people’s songs make me feel nostalgic for a time when I was younger, even if the song didn’t exist when I was younger. There’s just some element to the song that triggers a memory or a feeling from a time gone by. One of these songs is The Wrong Child by R.E.M. There’s a line about sprinklers which makes me think of a time when I was maybe 7, and a friend down the street was playing in the sprinklers on her front lawn. But there has to be more than that to The Wrong Child, because no other utterance of the word “sprinklers” evokes that image for me. I was 7 years old in 1978, whereas The Wrong Child was released in 1988, so clearly the song doesn’t contain a direct correlation. There has to be something in the music itself.

There are many other songs that do similar things for me (not necessarily a specific memeory, but often just a feeling, particularly of nostalgia), but none of my own music ever did. I always figured it was because I was too close to the song. But with the song Awareness on Sansbeat, I managed to do it, which makes me happy. Unfortunately, I don’t know why or how it happened, so I will just have to enjoy the fact that it happened at all.

Interestingly, it’s only the ending of Awareness that triggers it, and it’s only if I’ve listened all the way from the beginning. So clearly the beginning plays an important role in building the song up for me. The blast of goodness starts at 2:40, and peaks with the chord change at 3:07.

I feel like I did something truly right. Wonder what it is …

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